hurricanes & happiness
A study of the soul your blog didn’t have a comment option but this is what I’d like to say. You are very articulate and you express my feelings of loneliness, need to matter to someone, the sometimes emptiness, meaninglessness of life, our struggles and how other people’s good intentions and attempts at cheering us up, comforting us are more of a burden and irritating and patronising at the best of times. The sense of not being understood. Nobody understands and nobody really cares. People ask you, ‘How are you?’ and before you can answer they are gone.
At the end of this post you want to find that person who will do all those things with you, who will validate, understand and share your values and joys.
I have good news, you have found that person even though you don’t realise and she has been with you since your first gasp for breath and she will accompany you till your last. She understands you and what you’ve been through, your fears, hurts, inner heartache, loneliness better than anybody in this entire universe. Make friends with her, she is your ticket to happiness, to finally finding some peace within and being able to allow some joy and good stuff into your life.
Give yourself a chance to see the good stuff. Nature is beautiful, the roar of the ocean, birdsong, laughter of children, music and kindness especially from strangers. Love in its many splendid forms and it doesn’t have to be of the happy ending kind as I’m painfully learning.
Hope there is always hope.
loneliness is a depressing and devoted companion and i know people come and leave but it hurts all the same. when their lips form words that say they care and they’ll listen but you wonder if the sound waves were mangled before they caught your ears because it’s as if they never meant that at all. because absence speaks louder than promises so your missing presence drowns out your sweet utterances.
and then you wonder why they left and it’s because they expect all your pain to swiftly cease and they think you’re holding on too tightly to your past because they can’t understand why you wouldn’t want to let go of those abusive recollections and those horrific realities. but those have been life. those have been home. those have been identity for oh so long, maybe far too long. they can’t get it inside their pretty little heads that…
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