Siberian winds sweep across the land baby snowfall leave footprints in the sand icicles of love whisper reach out your hand frozen listen to the music of the band numb you have been too long warm your heart by the burning log wrap up do up the anorak togs feel safe and snug let me […]
Blog Archives
jigsaw
nothing fits some
times monsters invade
your head leave no
space never take a fag
break
some times it all comes
together just like that the
good fairy has cast a
spell it makes sense
you know what
happened beginning
middle end the pieces
fit you can let go move
on
melancholy
Gorgeous is a little melancholic today, suddening realising that this day 21 years ago she was a beautiful bride in plum silk cheung sam sitting on the love of her life’s knee to take their wedding photo. It was the best day of her life followed closely by that early morning half a year later when her beautiful baby came into this world. Her angel and shining light. She was beaming from deep within and so was he.
Alas the fairy tale didn’t last; the princess turned into a middle aged cancer survivor/divorcee living with depression and nursing a broken heart literally and emotionally. Rejection has hit her hard, to the very core of her being and she has had to dig deep, grit her teeth and go on.
loss (2)
like days blown by autumn leaves
swept by the breeze the pebble
sinking to the bottom of the sea
snow melting into the ground
memories edited distorted collected
full circle we have come nothing new
under the sun raging crashing waves
no hidden secret buried deep on the
ocean floor loss smiles beckons a
long lost friend reunited I embrace
thee cease be for you are the fabric
of life men come and go and stuff
what sifts through the giant colander
of time space is what’s worth
holding on family mates life itself
how
stopped asking why
futile
moved on to
how
everybody says move on let go
how
words are easy
meaningless
how
do you get all the pain out
forget the hurt accept loss
begin a new life not mourn the old
how
hold onto the good memories
not permit the end to taint
wring the last drop of love dry
how
It’s time
It’s time
to dry the ravenous tears
wrap a cast around your pierced heart
crawl inch by inch if you must
but get off that damn floor
keep moving
that way you know you are
still alive
Stand up tall
head held high
dignity is all
Look the mirror in the eye
pay huge respect
fighter survivor tough old bird
dug deep against immeasurable odds
terrified abandoned
did what she had to and
go on
It’s time
to get back on that horse
reclaim your power force
repay the kindness of strangers
when you found yourself
in a dark place with
nowhere to go
Make sense of why you had to endure survive
recurrent depression
cancer twice
chemo-induced heart failure
You were meant to live
do some good
It’s time
Poem a day challenge#9 Healed
You know you are healed when
a day passes and ‘he’ never crossed your
mind even you are bored of hearing
your ‘story’ and you realise how loved that friends
family haven’t gone for your throat the trillionth
time how they must have been screaming
inside when you stop to look at the butterflies
fluttering above petals when you feel like
singing
swaying to the beat don’t care what you
eat
no matter how fat when
tears stop flowing at the slightest
unexpected act of kindness when
you
don’t care what others think just
those you care about when you begin
to ‘love’ yourself some would call it
selfish I call it taking care of your needs
putting yourself first for a change when
you laugh from deep within notice the sky
blue birdsong hear the roar of the ocean
soothing your soul see the finish line flapping
beckoning
under the noon sun almost there babe,
few more baby steps and we touch
happiness release this broken
stray soaring heights
unlimited
free at last
Momentous decision
for my sister who never gave up on me
I’ve come to a momentous decision thanks to my best friend, Hazy Hay. Like the divorce courts in UK I am adopting the ‘no blame’ policy. relinquishing all anger, bitterness, resentment, sadness, disappointment, and feeling of loss. Why this dramatic change of heart? Well I’m not the Iate Baroness Thatcher; this lady is very much for the turning and been working hard at it. The wise Dalai Lama is right: it is foolish to make yourself ill from anger and be carted off to hospital while the ‘culprit’ is blissfully unaware.
If the truth be told my life is full of good things and there are more to come. You see I’ve been waiting patiently in line outside Santa’s Grotto and finally it’s my turn. Good things happen to good people, that is as it should be. Here’s a short list of the good stuff in my life: beautiful loving daughter, mum, dad, sisters who love me to bits and spoil me the baby of the family, good reliable friends, caring acquaintances here with great potential to become friends, spacious, quiet home all to myself, free security from village dogs, fresh delicious food, all that I need and more, facials and massage, freedom of speech, movement, beliefs, not feeling an outsider, compassion from strangers, relative good health, able to use all the senses, all limbs intact and functioning albeit protesting with aches and pains …
Related articles
- Anger Doesn’t Have to Be a Problem (susanjoan.wordpress.com)
- The Dalai Lama: our “Real Enemies.” (elephantjournal.com)
- Truth: Bitterness is blinding (seekingmoretruth.wordpress.com)
- Letting go of resentment (angietoh.com)
Life Laundry
Jul 31
separate the pain anger resentment into piles read the labels carefully add in a tab of forgiveness don’t forget the fabric conditioner of forgetfulness select the programme of letting go take out dry on the line under the burning sun blown by the breath of life fresh air smelling of sweet red roses freshly mowed […]
Loss
for Dee
Beethoven’s unfinished symphony ear of Van Gogh that
fav earring misplaced ne’er found
loss echoes resounds
whirling eddying pebble cast ripples profound
haunting waking sleepless nothing moments
taunting
Pain access all areas nil by mouth dulled once
razor sharp spiking drilling for oil soul’s ocean
secret depth buried treasure wreck core what
it means to be human suffering is all how to bear
with dignity hope till last drop wrung universal language
no phrasebook dictionary required tears UN interpreter
Mourn what I had childhood that ne’er was innocence
faith hope trust naivety ignorance is true bliss I envy
gift for head in sand a comforting safe place to
repose cease be
Like the days magical eagle soaring woman I was
aspired crispy Autumn leaves crunching beneath our feet
decaying crumbling merging whence it came moon waning
full crescent half eclipse tide rushing in out so I let go of
myriad loss that unfinished business called
life
